Amber: Dr. V What is a living will? Do I need one?
Amber that’s a great question. Many of us are just finishing college and are thinking about first jobs, relaxing vacations, first homes and never really stop to think about a living will. Plus, none of us like to think about accidents or illnesses affecting our lives, especially as women in our twenties, thirties or forties. We keep telling ourselves “I’ll take care of thoughts on medical care or crisis when I’m older”, but the fact of the matter is, just as you want your home, body, hair and finances in order, it’s essential for every woman to have things in order should our health leave our control. Specifically, it’s important for every woman to have conversations about, and take action in terms of, a living will and advanced directives.
It is essential for your friends, family, spouse, or partner to know exactly how to handle certain situations should you be unable to tell them yourself. If you don’t have those conversations you can leave the ones you love with guilt, anger, a lack of clarity and arguments. Because any medical decisions that are made regarding care is to be made AS YOU WOULD WANT FOR YOURSELF. Frequently problems arise when people are critically ill and families are divided about what do to regarding care. As physicians we are required to do what YOU would want to do for YOURSELF. And sometimes this desire can conflict with what your family may want for you. Instead of avoiding uncomfortable thoughts and conversations like this, it’s important for women to be proactive. In order to make that possible, I have created a handy User’s Guide to Living Wills for Women that you can read, share and take action on now!
What Is A Living Will:
A living will alerts medical professionals and your family to the treatments you want to receive or refuse, and under what conditions. This will only go into effect if you meet specific medical criteria and are unable to make decisions.
Why Do You Need A Living Will:
If in any circumstance you’re unable to speak for yourself you need those you love to be able to speak for you, in terms of what your wishes are. Preparing ahead of time for this via a living will ensures this happens and alleviates any stressors, arguments or confusion.
How Do You Make A Living Will Happen:
#1 – Put it in writing. A living will and power of attorney are legal documents, but you can draw them up yourself.
#2 – Want to write your living will yourself? Download a copy of your state’s living will. Every state has different rules concerning living wills, so be sure to download and complete the one recognized by your state. You can also find a sample living will at Aging With Dignity (www.agingwithdignity.org) that is now legal in 40 states.
#3 – Have Conversations with Those You Love: Sit down with your family, friends, spouse or partner, especially the one who you’ve designated as a “health care agent”, and explain what you’ve decided. Give them a copy of your documents and have your own doctor put one in your permanent medical record.
#4 – Review your papers every few years. Keep them somewhere safe, easily accessible place such as a secure file cabinet. If your personal and family situation ever changes (perhaps you get married, divorced or have children) you may want to make changes.
Hope this offers some help as you create your own plans.
XO
Dr. V